#7 – 9 things you just can’t handle
Fat Mum Slim‘s 50 things to blog about
So I finally finished #6 and thought I might get started on #7 now. Whilst the last one was a little somber; I’m hoping maybe this one will give someone a bit of a giggle.
Once again – referring back to +Fatmumslim‘s 50 things to blog about.
So here we go..
Wow. Where to start. Let me start by saying, I’m easily irritated so dwindling a list down to only 9 is going to be hard. This may end up being 9+100 things that annoy me.
I’m sorry, but I’m going to put these together. Mainly because if I was to list the food related things that annoyed me individually, well there goes my 9 all smack-bang at once.
I’m not going to lie; I’m a fussy eater. Always have been (you can ask my mum) and most likely always will be. Things were made even more difficult when I was diagnosed Coeliac in 2012. Cue the endless terrors of eating out & people telling me (yes mum and Cortney I mean you) ‘You should try it, you might like it’. Unlikely. Highly unlikely.
So there are 2 foods on this earth that I despise. As in, hate the smell, the texture, the look.. Every. Damn. Thing.
a) Cooked mushrooms. Those vile things make me want to vomit. As in, actually make me sick to the stomach. I could find the teeniest bit of cooked mushroom in a dish & pick it out. Every single piece.
I remember growing up with mum cooking them. She would have to give me a good 10 minute warning they were coming & I would lock myself in my room & not emerge for at least an hour. That smell does NOT go away quickly.
b) Seafood. Any seafood. All seafood. Fish, crab, squid, crayfish. Literally all of it. The smell. The taste. Just no.
I remember for years mum used to make me sit at the table, especially on Good Friday (we aren’t religious but this was the only day mum followed something like eating no red meat or whatever the deal is) and tell me ‘You’re not leaving until you’ve finished your fish’. I can’t remember what age it was that she gave up; but eventually I got to have chicken on Good Friday. I still can’t stomach it. Even walking through a shop, or the markets & that smell just twists my stomach.
2. People touching my feet.
Even I can’t touch my own feet sometimes. I have the most ridiculously ticklish feet. But it’s not oh-that’s-funny-ticklish. It’s I-want-to-kick-you-in-the-face-ticklish. 2 years ago, I went to Bali with my mum, sister, aunty & family friend for my mum’s 50th. There, they thought it would be a good idea to inflict a pedicure on me. I had never had one before, and spent the whole 30-40 excruciating minutes writhing in complete discomfort. The poor girl who had me, must’ve thought I was some sort of alien. I mean, aren’t all women supposed to like pedicures? Anyway – you would be happy to learn, I survived and she didn’t receive a roundhouse kick to the face.
My sister then thought it would be ‘fun’ to make me have one the day before my wedding. Yes! I know you do all those things before something big like your wedding, but it wasn’t all less horrible than the first one. I just can’t handle anyone touching my feet. Flat out horrible.
3. Something touching my left leg.
This one is a little weird, but let me explain..
Nearly 5 years ago, I had a knee reconstruction on my left leg. It healed nicely & I haven’t had any issues (except for needing a knee reconstruction on the OTHER leg, but that’s another story). Well, that is except for the numb/dead section on the outside of my leg leg. Just under my knee, partway between my shin & my calf. This has been there since the day I woke up from the surgery. There is always risks of such things as nerves being damaged, and I was one of those lucky ones. It’s horrible. I say it’s dead – but it’s not because I can feel something, it’s just not right, or normal. I can’t even begin to explain the feeling.
Now that brings me back to what actually annoys me about it. It’s not the actual numb section itself, its when something in close proximity & touches it. Ever so slightly. It’s like a jolt. Regardless of where I am, my let gets pulled back & as far away from the said object. I swear my hubby does it on purpose sometimes. When they do the whole ‘boy sit’ and his leg touches mine. What’s worse – is I think I’ve got the same numb feeling on my right leg, from my recent surgery. This isn’t going to go down well.
4. TV shows on break.
This is completely unnecessary. Especially mid season. I’m not even going to expand on this.
Just quit going on breaks. #please
5. Clapping in small spaces, aka the car.
I’m not even going to expand on this one, except say 1 thing – Travis; this is directed at you.
6. When the hubby slurps his food.
I don’t live with anyone else, so this is specific to the hubby. He slurps his food. All. the. time. He slurps it when it’s hot, he slurps it when it’s cold.
It immediately grinds my gear, and I just want to shove his face into his food.
Refer back to #2 – this goes for anyone’s feet. I just hate them.
8. The feeling of dried salt on my hands.
I’ve never stated anywhere that I’m not a little odd. Well I am, and there are some weird things that irritate me that didn’t make this list. This is the biggest one.
You know that feeling when you’ve been to the beach, and you literally have dried salt all over my body. In your hair, on your lips, your legs & your hands. Well that feeling right there, to me is almost as bad as scratching nails down a blackboard.
I hate it when my hands are dry, but the feeling after being at the beach is 100 times worse. I will actually sit there, with my hands clenched until I can wash them, or wet them, or put some sort of moisture on them.
9. Spiders – or anything with more than 4 legs.
This isn’t even something that annoys me, this is a fear. Which is getting worse, the older I get. So much so – I don’t even want to get into it. Those bastards freak me the f**k out.
Well that sure was interesting! I hope you all learnt a little bit about me, and now realise I’m a little more twisted than you thought.
Until next time